Friday, March 18

i've been a little MIA and i might ramble a bit here...

I didn't mean to go missing.

I realized that I've been away from this blog for over a month.  That kinda surprised me.

I'm not really sure what happened, other than life of course.

I think I've been a little burnt out lately.  Tired of the monotony.  Just been in a funk.  Has that ever happened to you?  (Please tell me it has!)

Being a mom is hard.  Being a wife is hard.   Being a homemaker is hard.  Sometimes I'm not sure which is harder.    Sometimes I wonder if I'm making a difference.  Does any of "this" have eternal value?  My daily tasks seem so insignificant when viewed in light of eternity.

I have a 2 year old who needs me to read a "bears on bears" book.  (that's a Berenstain Bear Book, if you don't speak "ian")

I have a 10 year old who needs me to teach him long division and explain the digestive system.

I have a 6 year old who needs me to tell her, again, that there are no tarantulas under her bed.

I have a pile of laundry that needs washing, dinners to be cooked, bathrooms to be cleaned, floors to be mopped.

I have a husband who comes home and needs me too, but often only gets the leftovers of my day.

I have my own creative impulses that get pushed off and go unfulfilled making me resentful.

Then when the fatigue, the doubts, and stress of it all starts to hit, the Master of Lies comes to me and gives me doubts.  What is all this for?  What is the point of all this?  Why do all this work when in the end it comes to nothing?  Your life isn't making a difference, you might as well not try.  In my weakness, I start to believe those lies.

But, then, the Heavenly Father whispers to my soul,

Your life is making a difference.  By serving these three sweet babes, you're serving Me.  By loving your husband, you're loving Me.    I have a plan for you and right now the plan is to be right where you are.  Serving your family, providing a loving home, nourishing their bellies, as well as their souls...that is my plan for you right now and that is enough.  By serving your family as the keeper of the home, I'm drawing you closer to Me.

You are not defined by your role as a wife.  You are not defined by your role as a mom.  You are not defined by your role as a woman.  Those things do not fulfill you, nor do they complete you. 

I define you as one of Mine.   You are already complete in Me.   


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